Tomkat OVER!

Oh lord, is this true?! Has little Joey Potter really escaped from the clutches of the evil Cruisemesiter?

Life & Style has learned exclusively that Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes have agreed to call off their wedding — and, ultimately, to split.

Multiple insiders confirmed the story to Life & Style, with one longtime friend of Tom’s saying: “Their relationship is basically over.” Another friend adds: “They both agreed that the marriage wouldn’t work and they wanted to end it before they learned to hate each other.”

The insiders say that Tom, 43, and Katie, 27, plan to keep up the charade of a romance until after their baby’s birth this spring. In the meantime, the couple will live in his Beverly Hills home — though sleeping in separate bedrooms — through the summer. Then, presumably, they’ll announce a separation — but Tom plans to buy Katie a home nearby so he can visit his child whenever he wishes.

“They’ll share custody,” says the friend, who claims the couple are drawing up a legal document to provide for Katie’s and the baby’s financial well-being for life. “Tom will set up Katie and the baby,” adds the pal.

I don't know why I find this so interesting. I mean, it was an obvious sham from the get go, n'est pas?
Poor little Katie. She forsook Christ for Cruise, and all she got was millions of dollars, a false belly and oral herpes. What would Dawson say?

UPDATE: FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE STATEMENT REGARDING TOM CRUISE AND KATIE HOLMES AND LIFE & STYLE MAGAZINE Los Angeles, CA (February 14, 2006) - In reference to a forthcoming cover story in the tabloid magazine Life & Style about Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, it should be known that the story is 100% false. Mr. Cruise and Ms. Holmes are still engaged and are moving forward with their wedding plans, as well as planning for the arrival of their child. Despite the malicious fallacies put forth by Life & Style magazine, the couple is looking forward to a long and happy life together as a family.

Poor little Katie. That still stands.